I’ve got a joke: What walks on 8 legs until it’s one year old, 4 legs until its twenty years old, and then 2 legs for the remainder of it’s life?
where did the little girl go when the bomb went off?
Let me just remind you.
One of these days, you’re going to buy the newest Mario game or Zelda game, and you’re super excited.
You go home all giddy and happy like a little kid who’s getting a new game they’ve been wanting for so long now. You turn on your console and put the game in.
As the game boots up, before you are taken to the title screen, a black screen shows up, and white text will appear on the screen…
"In loving memory of Shigeru Miyamoto"
"Those ribbons are really cute!"
"Thank you. I snatched them from your dead daughter’s body."
if you don’t watch the amazing world of gumball i highly suggest you reevaluate
I just spit a sunflower seed across the room
"…Is there really a limit to how many sharp things a person can own?"
No, there is not.
And even if there were, why would you care?
it’s hard to believe humans are 80% water until you try stir-frying one. you would not believe how many times you have to drain it to get that nice, pan-blackened crust.
Hey, remember when we thought this was, like, a fun superhero parody with silly songs and whatnot? And we all laughed and laughed? And then the last five minutes happened?
NO ONE WARNED ME ABOUT THE END WHEN I WATCHED IT THIS MORNING SO I TEXTED MY FRIEND AND GO “WHAT THE SHIT YOU COULDN’T HAVE WARNED ME?!”
no one ever does warn us
LITERALLY THERE WAS NO WARNING YOU’RE JUST LIKE “THIS IS SO CUTE AND FU—WHAT THE FLYING TOMATOING FUCKING CHIMPANZEE”
I liked that it ended that way.
One of my favorite movies. TRY GET A RESERVATION AT DORSIA NOW!
i have been informed that it’s battler’s birthday today as well!!
happy birthday, little guy
all of your loved ones are dead (◕‿◕✿)